Utopian's Oasis

2009-12-29T11:58:00.003+08:00

This blog is so dead -.-
(Shall talk about the Japan trip after I finish my homework)

Time really flies... 2009 is going to be over soon. But looking back at 2009, it has been a year of maturing for me, in every area. My academics, my emotions, my passion for music... etc.

Joining Hong Kah North CC CO had definitely been one of the best thing I did this year, not only had I met new friends who share the same passion for CO (and cello), I also improved my skills in playing the cello. While the cellists at HKNCCCO are so much better in terms of skills than me, they make me feel welcomed and are willing to teach me what they know! Thanks Jay Hui, Jean and Gerard (sp?)! :D

For my academics, while there are some subjects that I did better and other subjects that are hovering between the B3~B4 standard, I finally realize the path that I really want to walk down. At the end of the day, what matters is that you are happy and contented with your job, rather than earning lots of money and not feeling satisfied with what you are doing.

The transition period from secondary two to secondary three has really taken a toll to me during the first half of the year, but it's this period that led me to learn proper stress management. Many other stuffs also happened, but that's something I'd rather not talk about. But there's this one special friend I'd like to thanks for giving me the advice that I need- Janice. :D

Definitely looking forward to a brand new year in 2010! Especially the secondary one orientation, haha!

2009-10-31T19:42:00.002+08:00

"我不能改变我的过去，但我能改变我的现在和未来" --假扮终极三国里刘备的呼延觉罗脩

超崇拜东城卫的脩, 不仅吉他弹的好, 演技也是一流的!

2009-10-24T17:59:00.003+08:00

Tues 27/10
A.Maths
Geography/ Full Literature
E.Maths
Chemistry
Physics

Wed 28/10
Biology
Chemistry
A.Maths
Geography/ Full Literature
Physics

Thurs 29/10
HUMe
~~Chemistry~~ Biology [Yes, two Bio periods]
~~[Insert subject]~~ HMT
Geography/ Full Literature
Biology

Friday 30/10
Geography/ Full Literature
A.Maths
~~Chemistry~~ Biology
E.Maths

Monday 2/11
Geography/ Full Literature
~~Biology~~ Chemistry
SS
E.Maths
A.Maths

Tuesday 3/11
HUMe
~~Biology~~ Chemistry
E.Maths
[Insert subject]

Wednesday 4/11
A.Maths
E.Maths
Physics
SS
Chemistry

Thursday 5/11
HUMe
Biology
Chemistry
[Insert subject]
Physics

Friday 6/11
A.Maths
SS
Physics
Biology

2009-10-19T14:26:00.001+08:00

MySpace Music Playlist at MixPod.com

天快亮了能不能别离开呢

沉默像首悲伤的歌

捂上视线却模糊了

你要走了也带走所有快乐

甜蜜的片段散落了

疲倦了心冷了我哭了

那流星闪过

我们许下一个愿望

要在一起绝不分离

你怎么放弃了

星空在闪烁

像你的眼泪悄悄划过

当你放开了手离开的时候

有没有一点舍不得我

泪光在闪烁

而我的眼泪忍住不敢坠落

我还留在黑暗中守候

你却已经远远离开我

离开我了梦醒了还剩什么

我要的幸福消失了

你的心曾经属于我的

那流星闪过

我们许下一个愿望

要在一起绝不分离

你怎么放弃了

星空在闪烁

像你的眼泪悄悄划过

当你放开了手离开的时候

有没有一点舍不得我

泪光在闪烁

而我的眼泪哽住不敢坠落

我还留在黑暗中守候

你却已经远远离开我

有过的快乐我都记得

回忆还旋转着爱怎么停了

我们都累了 ha~

星空在闪烁

像你的眼泪悄悄划过

当你放开了手离开的时候

有没有一点舍不得我

泪光在闪烁

而我的眼泪忍住不敢坠落

我还留在黑暗中守候

你却已经远远离开我

2009-10-15T21:57:00.002+08:00

There's so many things I want to vent out, but don't know where to start at. Found a really touching story online:

One particular day, a teenager was walking with his head high in the air, and missed the young boy in front of him. The young boy was looking at the ground the moment they collided together. Without warning, the teenager gave the young boy a lashing, asking him to look in front while walking instead of looking down. Just then, some random stranger came by, telling the young boy the same thing. However, just as the teenager was gloating about the incident, the stranger told him this, "You should have paid more attention to what is in front of you, not what is above you."

To the young boy who lacks confidence in life, the stranger told him to believe in himself and not look down upon himself. To the haughty teenager who is over-confident, the stranger told him not to be complacent and have his feet to the ground. Through a very simple incident, we can see two totally different reactions to it.

It's true, one cannot be too haughty, nor can one look down on oneself. Do not dwell in the past, do not look too much into the future: it's today that we must grasp hold of.

所以，我学会了宽容。

2009-10-15T15:10:00.001+08:00

FINAL END EXAMINATIONS OFFICIALLY ENDS! XDD

2009-09-26T15:40:00.007+08:00

Recently been watching Moonlight Resonance and The Legend of the Demigods and I realized, even if they are just drama serials, ain't the scriptwriters writing all the nature of humans:

人性是多么的丑恶，令我彻底的失望。所谓的承诺，根本就一文不值。道听途说，断章取义，故意扭曲事实，陷害他人谋福利，从何时变成人的本质。最可恶的，就是那些傻瓜，不查出事实的真相，便轻易相信他人所说的每一句话，任凭恶人摆布。可耻，可笑。世界就是那么的可笑，道高一尺，魔高一丈，你以为善会胜过恶，认为自己委屈一点，忍气吞声，恶人就是良心发现，但到最后却被反咬一口，多不值得。这时你才会发现，人类是多么的肤浅。这些小人，何必跟他们计较，即费心又费时，倒不如花心思把时间放在有意义的事务上，让自己更充实。

2009-09-14T20:19:00.000+08:00

Sickening and irritating backside driver. Idiot.

2009-09-07T16:09:00.000+08:00

I'm suddenly very inspired to write this after going for the LitFest last saturday. Sidetrack a bit, we weren't in the debate competition 'cus somehow the regristration got rebounded and apparently there wasn't any other schools doing Fahrenheit 451 that came for the LitFest. That's life for you.

Moving back, the GOH made a really heartwarming speech. Qouting him "We may all have heard of Science (particularly he likes to target Physics), Maths, Music prodigy that finished their ph.D at a tender age or the Nobel Prize respectively, but none of us has ever heard of a teenager getting a Nobel Prize in Literature for that matter."

What he said really struck a chord in me. It's really true, isn't it? In order to study Literature, to understand it and synchronize with it, it takes years of personal experiences and a high level of maturity to even be able to understand the author's intention behind the book. Citing another example that the GOH had said, he once read Animal Farm like all of us did back in his secondary school day. After so many years, he could still remember the character Boxer, and questions himself the same question that came out for exams last year, was Boxer a naive character believing in everything the higher ups say or is he enduring everything for the sake of a better future?

Here the GOH posted a question to us, at school, at work, when you get frustrated over some matter, do you silently swallow up the grudge and unhappiness you have, or rebel, like the animals against Old Major at the start of the book? Do you continue to work harder, believing that your boss will see your ability and give you a raise or do you change to another company, in hope of a better salary, a better future?

It's amazing how a text we study is able to link to the outer world (i.e the world we live in, beyond the story's society), but that is essentially the essence of Literature. It is not just studying about characters' personality, their interaction, but more of the resemblance to our world. (Side note: This is also what Mr James Tan told the full lit class during the first few Lit lessons)

But it's sad, that Literature is now a dying subject in Singapore. No doubt, Literature is hard to study, and not everybody possess the maturity to understand any given text. Hence, schools would rather do away with Literature in Upper Secondary as they do not want it to affect the school's standing in the rankings. Some students are hence robbed of the chance to study Literature, but what can they do?

That's life.

Of reunion and reminiscence

2009-09-05T18:14:00.000+08:00

So long since I last updated my blog. Gosh.

Anyway, term 3 has zip passed in an blink of an eye and term 4 is coming up soon. EOY and O lvl chinese coming up and I really can't afford to screw it up and forgo HCL =( I need to deduct my four marks in O lvl!!

This year's Teachers' Day was quite a meaningful one for me 'cus it's the first Teachers' Day celebration back at the new campus and the second year I went back to TWPS.

Snapped quite a lot of photos, so just head over to my Facebook to view them 'cus I'm lazy to upload them here as well. Opps...

Oh ya, forgot to mention that we got to dissect a goat's heart during Biology SPA lesson. Cool! Photos at Facebook at well. Hahas.

2009-08-15T15:42:00.000+08:00

I miss life in the old campus =( To me it seems that old campus has more of a 'school-y' feeling, though I think most would disagree with me. Even after so long, I still haven't gotten used to the new campus. It might be brand new but it seems to lack the homely feeling. For example, classroom layout. While the classroom may be small and cramped at times, people are sitting closer to each other and it is easier to talk too. Each level will occupy one storey of the block and it makes friends from different classes easier to communicate with each other too. Now, there's only two classes on each storey, which is kind of lonely if you ask me.

Then, CCA practice. CO sectional practice would span across the whole first/ second floor of the lower sec campus and each section have their respective 'room' to use. 大组 would only be a few classrooms down the row, which is conveniently near. The sections are generally closer with much stronger bonds since we have time to interact, especially with seniors. Now, sectionals are in MP1 and MP2 and it is difficult for juniors and seniors to interact with so many sections in the same room and the noise level. It is no longer as cozy. And again thing, juniors are getting more and more rude and disrespectful, lacking responsibility and the will to learn. They would take each privilege given to them as what they ought to have, and it's kinda sad to hear about it. E.g Air-con. We as juniors in the past didn't even asked for air-conditioned room for sectional practice and we don't even DARE to talk back at our seniors. But alas, times have changed. People are getting more and more materialistic.

Kind of feeling 怀旧 today. Oh well.

2009-08-07T22:28:00.004+08:00

It is only through the darkest times, where you will know who your true friends are. Time is not a determining factor for sure though. You can know someone for long, but he isn't your true friend, but you might not know someone for long, yet he will help through in your darkest times. I'd rather have one true friend than many accuintances that are waivered by rumours. I have a clear conscience, I shouldn't bother explaining myself.

Haha shan't think about those stuffs anymore.

Wednesday stayed back to decorate the CO notice board, thanks Jorin and Noreen for helping out!! Noreen really very helpful, helping out even though she not CO member. Thanks again!! And Thursday was stock-taking, I didn't realise the CO store room have so many treasures. There's so many scores that CO perform in the past, eg. Beauty and the Beast. Aw, I wanna play that song sometimes too. Had a shock when Joyce was cleaning the timpani casing, 'cus it somehow rusted (but how in the first place did the cloth came in contact with iron?? O_o) and when Jorin tried to beat the Iron (III) Oxide (sorry couldn't help it =P) out, it created a mess. Oops.

Today was the NDP Parade and Cheering Comp. Congratz to 101, a certain sec 2 class I forgot, 3T2 and 3M1 for winning the cheering competition. =)

Tritiums we did well too, though kinda screwed up at some parts, but at least we tried our best and that's really matters. Final cheering comp anyway, have regrets also no use. Not as if everything can start over again. And Jorin's idol aka 不老的传说 aka Melissa performed on stage today, singing Where I Belong in Chinese Version! Woohooo~~~

And Mrs Poh treated us to ice cream, yay! But it comes with A.Maths homework, lol. Afterwards, met up with my sis together with Melissa to go PastaMania and eat. Saw Gideon, Wee Kiat and Ming Zhe there too. And Erna (sp??), one purple-clothing MC for today, Yan Ping and Alfred too. Met Jorin, Shu Lei and Jie Ling at Mini Toons and chatted like 1 hour? And I must admit, 我老了！Barely through the conversation my back was like aching and I squated down with Melissa, lol. And STM (short-term memory) is coming back to me again, perhaps due to lack of sleep?? I must write down everything and sets an alarm or esle I'd definitely forget that thing, *cough bio presentation cough*

Congratz to Kelvin and Hui Ling for your engagement this September!! Don't worry I'll be there <3 Pei Xian, it will be your turn soon won't it? ;P

2009-07-26T18:55:00.000+08:00

Woah, it has been ages since I ever updated this dusty blog of mine. So, school has started, everything is zipping pass me once again like semester 1. Time flies when you're in school eh? Anyway, wish to take this chance to say a big "THANK YOU!" for everyone's birthday wishes and/or presents. I really loved each and every of them ^^

Hurray, 3T1 Tritiums went into the finals for the cheering comp! We shall rock the house, woohoo~

2009-06-25T20:07:00.000+08:00

I really enjoyed today's NXFL gathering, made me realised that maybe we haven't really drifted yet. That's a relief ^^

Anyway, KBOX!! OMG, it's has been like 3568o653454o83653485 ~~days~~ ~~months~~ ~~days~~ seconds since I have ever went to Kbox since like last Dec's tenor outing. Speaking of which, I want my tenor outing!! Damn you H1N1!! D<

2009-06-15T21:29:00.002+08:00

Today was considered the last day of the Water Quality course at SP. Frankly speaking, I'm missing the course already. Anyway, the pictures are up on my Facebook, but I'm lazy to post it to my blog, so... Please go my Facebook if you wanna see the photos. +)

2009-06-13T23:43:00.002+08:00

This is a really very late post =P

Anyway, have been planning to update on the Water Quality and Treatment course but was swarmed by the need to complete the elearning assignments due this week. Aw man. However I'm now proud to say that I've cleared off my Bio and SS. (K fine I'll admit I'm guilty of procrastination as it's already the end of week 2 and I've done less than half of my holiday homework?!)

Without further ado, let's a recount of what happened during the 5 days at Singapore Poly.

(Pictures will be uploaded tomorrow I guess)

Day 1: We analysed the water quality at Singapore Poly's Pond and I got bitten by lots of mosquitoes (not kidding) to the point that when the lecturer offered us insect repellant, we rejected it 'cus it was kinda late =x Then in the afternoon we went to a stream next the German Centre and boy, the hills were really STEEP and we had to descend down to the bottom of the hill to analyse the water quality there. Kudos to Hao Fei who was able to lie so freely on the hill without tumbling down when we're having troubles descending.

Day 2: There was a trek/hike to the Ngee Ann Stream which obviously, is next to Ngee Ann Poly. (It's near Bt Timah Hill) Believe me, some of the grasses growing there were taller than Melissa (oops =P) and there are lots of "booby traps" lying in the grasses waiting for its victims to step into it. Not to mention the slippery slopes and muddy ground. I must especially thank Hao Fei and Yong Kang for helping me throughout the trek 'cus if not for them, I would have fallen into the river full of pathogens or tumbled down the hill like a fool.

Oh ya, Melissa and I was like commenting how lucky the people in the nanotech course were 'cus while we're pespiring like anything and whatever, they're happily having their lecture in an air-conditioned room. In the afternoon was a lab lesson at the Microbiology Lab where we had to do two experiments to determine the number of pathogens inside our water sample.

Day 3: Lecture in the morning and lab lesson in the afternoon where we got to analyse the type of metals present inside our water samples (be it Fe or Al). It was quite fun handling the pipettes and the ICP-OES machine that analysed our metal content. Oh ya, the ICP-OES contains argon heated to the plasma state (8000-12000 degree Celcius) to ionize the sample. Cool!

Day 4: Trek/ Hike in the morning like day 2, but to the nearby water bodies near Pandan Reservoir to perform water qualit studies. This time round it wasn't as tedious as to the Ngee Ann Stream, though there were some slippery slopes and muddy areas that wasn't very pleasant as one could easily slip and fall, which happened to me =x (only the slipping part, thankfully did not injure myself) We also got to witness the residue of barnacles that once grew on the rocks and a mangrove swamp! Very worth the experience!

The lab lessons in the afternoon involve getting back our results for the number of pathogens inside our water sample (refer to day 1) and testing for the alkalinity and hardness of water sample. There's like more than or equal to 2400 coliforms in our diluted 100ml of water sample, which is really scary =x Oh ya, the dish which was used to cultivate our pathogens stink to the core (literally), which I heard from Shi Qiu, Su Li and Hao Fei. I didn't dare to smell it for safety reasons =P

We got to use phenolphthalein and bomcresol green indicator solution for our titration experiemnt which the end results looked really nice. The professor even commented that our titration results were one of the best he ever saw, yay! (Thanks to Bo Bing for making it possible!) Oh ya, I think I'm falling in love with titration experiments more and more!

Day 5: Had a bit of lecture before playing a short quiz (in the form of snake and leader). For the game, every alternate step has a question and if we can answer the question correctly, we get to move a certain number of steps, but if we got the answer wrongly, we have to move back a number of steps as well. In the middle of the game, BP team 1 and BP team 2 combined power and colaborated together. The results were: Teck Whye- First, BP Team 2-Second, West Spring- Third, Bp Team 1-Fourth, Kranji -Fifth

Then for the lab lesson in the afternoon, we got to measure amount of chloride present in the water sample as well as the chemical oxygen demand (COD). The measurement of chloride involved a very basic theory that Mr Lim taught us, the precipitation of AgCl. It's kind of cool to see what we learn in theory being utilized in practical lessons. For the COD experiement, we had a chance to experiment with concentrated sulphuric acid and the use of a fuse cupboard. Very enlightening! I got in contact with a reflux machine once again and this time round I finally understand how it works (with the last time being during the Forensics course)

So I guess that's about the end. I'll upload the pictures together, though I'm not sure whether to my facebook or blogger.

2009-06-10T22:08:00.002+08:00

Just in case you're wondering what's wrong with my blog, rest assure that nothing is wrong with my blog, just that I'm too lazy to make the necessary changes to my blog skin 'cus the previous skin had a code error that I couldn't identify so in the end I decided to just change it all together. Anyway, I'll post more on Sat after the Water Treatment course 'cus I really can't find the time to post a ridiculously large amount of photos to blogger 5 at a time, too time consuming. Anyway, later!

2009-06-01T22:36:00.002+08:00

Recently had been doing lots of crazy thinking, and would like to share some views. As most should know, the recent North Korea saga about atomic bombs testing and such. For History students like me (not trying to be prejudice against any Econ/Geog students of course) who studied what happened with Germany after WW1 and what the League of Nations (something like modern UN) did, it's like literally "History repeats itself", no?

Here is a quote from My Paper May 28, "Russian Foreign Minister Sergei Lavrov said the council should "speak out toughly" but not "punish for the sake of punishment"... The problem can be settled only through talks". Sounds familiar, History students? Sometimes I think that people just talk and do no actions, not that commoners like us can do anything about it anyway.

It's like, what do you want to go war for? Patriotism towards the Communist state? Nationalism? Please, nobody wants a re-enact of Hitler going to war -.-

Imagine, after 64 years of peace, here we have stirrings about war again. For children like us born in a prospering era, we should feel grateful that we did not have to go through war or suffering the afer-effects, but suddenly that peace seemed threatened. It's fragile. Any wrong move will spark a new war. And this time, it's not like the war is happening somewhere far away in Europe or something, it's right here in Asia.

Just feel totally disappointed at everything. Haiz.

2009-05-23T21:35:00.002+08:00

In spite of the skin rash, in spite of the muscle cramps, I must admit that camp was really enjoyable and motivated me a lot. At first, I was really reluctant to go to camp, but that feeling went away when we started out our activities. Like what Mr Tom Chan said, some sec 3s last year were reluctant to go for camp, but on the last day some were crying because they don't want to return. I'm one of them (not the crying part la).

Like what I said in my conversation with Rui Feng just now, the camp was really special. For example, our PMs were not authoritative. They really demonstrated what is the meaning of "One for All, All for One". When we were doing the success claps (and boy my muscles really ached like anything), they did it with us, and not standing in one corner looking at us do. They too did and suffered our consequences with us, when they did not do anything wrong.

And they also made me understand the meaning that we are not alone, such as the time when our hands were really tired, and one of the PMs said, "You not alone, you can lean yourself against your friend you know"? That was when did I realise, "Oh ya, true!" Like what Rui Feng said, this camp challenged us to walk out of our comfort zones into a totally new experience of a lifetime.

I'll forever treasure what Encik (sp?) Jeff said about appreciation. It was really touching that I cried during his talk. But there's nothing to be embarrassing about =) And like what PM Andrew said, "You might remember the experience at the Postman Walk, but you'll not remember who shook the ropes". Many times, what you'll remember is the experience, not the obstacle that you faced. You learn from experiences.

This camp had really changed my life and how I view the world.

2009-05-15T14:06:00.002+08:00

Exams are finally OVER!!!
Finally it's time for me to repay all my sleep debts that I've been owing for the past 1 week! Urgh, stress =(
Anyway, summary of all my papers.

English: This is goner man. How could I have written my personal recount in the present tense?? Urgh you stupid fool. I would be grateful to the marker if I can pass. Paper 2 summary, goner as well.

HMT: This was the first time I actually had hope in my HMT. Compared to last year's paper, I felt this was relatively simpler.

SS: Essay was within my control, Good Governance in Singapore =D SBQ as well. Hoho.

Pure Lit: Urgh. For the characterization, I FORGOT to compare Mildred and Clarisse. GG for me. Poem was easier for me as compared to prose.

Chemistry: Tedious paper. All the moles killed my brain cells. -.-

Physics: Don't feel like mentioning this. Not hard, but tedious.

Biology: Ah ha. I love this subject <3 Especially the essay on molecular genetics.

History: Muahahaha! Evil dictators on the loose!! Essay was quite ok, since we managed to predict that our beloved Hilter (just joking >.<) will be coming out. SBQ was ok as well, but Ms Tay said that I didn't quote evidence, which I thought I did. Ah!

(Edit: I can't believe I forgot to write in A.Maths and E.Maths -.-)
A.Maths: I think the BBQ Mrs Poh promised us is within my control. I hope.
E.Maths: Urgh. I find A.Maths so MUCH easier than this.

-
Ok so it's after exams, suddenly I feel so 空虚. Joking. Going back to maple with Le En, Jia Ying and Jia Yan. Haha!

2009-04-30T23:10:00.003+08:00

It's really scary, if you think about it. What, you're asking. The Swine flu/ Mexican flu/ North American flu/ whatever you call it -.-

WHO have raised the alert to phase 5 Orange, meaning a pandemic is imminent. Singapore govt planning to raise it to phrase 6 Red, which means lots of things I'm lazy to name here, you should check out MOH's website if you have the time.

http://www.moh.gov.sg/mohcorp/default.aspx

Anyway, Silas called me a swine flu addict, 'cus I spent 2 hrs (3. 5 hours to be exact now) reading reports/ articles/ write-ups/ pages and pages on the swine flu and somehow those linked to Spanish Flu/ Global Handwashing Day and lots of other stuffs -.-

Oh ya, I must say that I've fallen in love with Yahoo! News. Can get news quite quickly, and hopefully accurate too.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2009_swine_flu_outbreak

And this is really disturbing. I seriously read through the whole page and even clicked on some of the hyperlinks. The information are overloading in my brain currently -.- (I didn't even do all these during the SARS outbreak!)

OH YA, just now as I was in my tuition centre, my tuition teacher told me that when she went to Watson and Guardian, all the thermometers and surgical masks are out of stock. (Lol our school still have stock!) She also said that the govt might be implementing for govt controlled tuition centres to temporarily close down and even schools! (No MYE??) And I opt for no level camp! 'Cus the swine flu can spread through aesorols and blah blah blah, the list goes on.

Oh well, let's just PRAY HARD that the govts would work closely together to stop any further outbreak in any continents/ countries! Or it will really lead to a pandemic!!

--
o1's first 2009 gathering was quite a success, IMO. Some didn't turn up due to illnesses but overall it was still enjoyable, though dampen by the fact I have to leave early for tuition, garh! Didn't manage to take much pics, so maybe I shall get some from class blog/ Felicia/ Jia Ying. Haha~!

2009-04-26T18:19:00.003+08:00

It's an contradicting and ironical world out there -.-
Rejoice! I got a silver for my NAPFA finally, after so many years. And how ironical is that? I still remember how immediately after Mrs Neo announce my result I was so freaking happy, then I got dragged back to the reality that [I don't want to say].

I'm a happy girl right now, 'cus I finally understand Kinematics! (At least the elementary part -.-) Finally my efforts paid off after staring at my Physics textbook for like 3 hours? Lost count of time. I was really depressed that day during Physics, partly due to the scholars. I mean, it's not their fault, I'm just finding myself stupid for not understand what Mr. Chin is saying. So that's why apparently on Thursday -01's first meeting-, I was so freaking moody and talking only when needed. And it isn't helping with the fact that some fly is buzzing around annoyingly, metaphorically speaking.

Digressing a bit, I find the song 殇 by Jacqueline du Pre really nice! (It's the song Le En recommended to me) It can really evoke sadness in you, even when you had only heard it once. I'm addicted to this song, I guess.

2009-04-21T18:08:00.002+08:00

不是所有的坚持和努力都会取得胜利，如果你已经尽了力，即使失败了，你也会问心无愧。如果“忧郁"成为你的习惯，那就不好了，下定决心把它忘掉吧！如果有一改换环境，就非得认真对待不可，否则会错过机会。

This was taken from this week's I Weekly Horoscope. Apparently this is quite true. Urgh. Still can't get over it.

I can't believe how a minute before people are still comforting one another that it's okay, it's alright, it's not your fault, then the next minute totally 翻脸不认人 and start blaming people. And it's especially disgusting when that person made mistakes too. Suckcore. This isn't what I would call a team. Haha, kind of ironic.

Stop blaming her already, it's not her fault. This is not a case of "the bad workman blames his tools", nobody expected that situation to crop up right? Stop blaming her and making her feel more guilty (when it's not even her fault, too!), you are no saint, so is she.

Silver

2009-04-20T18:35:00.002+08:00

Silver. Ag. Pure element, ain't it cool?
I really wanted to change BPCO's history. Why not Au? I really don't know. It's not as if we aren't prepared or anything, we were prepared, damn it. Is it a curse or what? All of the unexpected accidents just came up. Things that did not happen during normal practices or rehearsal. When we were still at school, I thought gold was just at our fingertips. Just that final push before we can grasp it. Then, final rehearsal. Things were still going fine, no major errors whatsoever.

The moment we had been waiting, the day which we waited for 3 years, 4 months. Since the day I step foot into BPCO. Inside the concert hall, my heart was beating very strongly. Finally calmed down after starting the Song of Cicada. Started moving my body to the music, things was proceeding well till bar 17. Her. With her serious attitude problem.

I don't know why, after dou niu, I felt we needed a miracle to get gold. A miracle that is equivalent to having the economic crisis saved by mid-year. Impossible.

On the bus , I fought back my tears. I faked a smile, tried laughing. Facade. Tried hard not to cry, so as not to dampen the already sour mood. If I broke down, my section could have cried, including Kee Leng. Back at school, I tried to distract myself from all thoughts, just focused on moving the instruments, did not work. After dismissal, went for Lit class. Couldn't contain my tears anymore when Mrs Selvi asked how was SYF. I really couldn't. Deep inside, I know joining SYF was for the experience, but I really wanted the recognition. I do not want BPCO to be looked down further. I felt that we had let down the school. Le En, Sherlyn and I hugged and cried together. That was the first time I understood what the Chinese idiom of 眼泪像断了线的珍珠一样掉下. It was really a depressing scene. Qing Xi came in, tried to cheer us up, with Melissa, Silas, Jia Ying, Jia Yan, Irwin.

To that someone: 你并不是一个不好的队长，你已经尽力了。若要自责，身为副队长的我不是应该更自责吗？

2009-04-19T14:18:00.003+08:00

hey people, bet you wun know where i'm at now. Anw, i'm at the library doing cip. You must be thinking, cip how is it possible to use com, but i'm using my phone and logging into the wireless system =p

anw, this is just a random post cuz i'm bored. Not many ppl come for the book exchange.

Ah. .. Tmr is syf alr! I'm scared that tmr i din move enough. Ah! K i think i end off here first, someone is approaching me for help

2009-04-15T19:31:00.002+08:00

To say that I'm not disappointed would just be self-deception. Did I not try hard enough? I don't know. I seriously don't.
--
I'm really tired out, this week, last week. Mentally, physically. Time just seemed to fly pass quickly. I don't even have the time to catch my breath. I don't. A bad habit of mine, is that I'm afraid of giving the wrong answer and implicate people, like that time at the Chem-Comm. I'm too indecisive. But when Mr Lim told me that what I had in mind was correct, I really regretted not saying it. "Sugars are found naturally, why is there a need to synthesis them?" If only I had added on to what Irwin said, that 'sugars' was just a vague term, that there are different types of sugars with different chemical formulas, some of which not naturally-occurring, maybe we would have stand a chance. And that was not the only incident. Regrets, regrets.
--
Thanks Ke Yun and Jeryl for cheering me up :)

2009-04-09T23:42:00.009+08:00

Just as I ended my last post, I just realised something. My trip to Indonesia.

So speaking about the trip to Indonesia, more specifically Tanjung Pinang, I have mixed feelings about it. One thing, I kinda enjoyed the ferry trip to and fro, the kind of rocky feeling that's sure to make you fall asleep, which well, I slept quite a while on the ship. And another thing, I really liked the president suite. It's enormously huge, which is much larger than the hotel I stayed in when I was in Hong Kong.

But then again, something which I didn't quite like was how the drivers don't have eyes /don't use them. Seriously, they rely far too much on the horn. Zzz. And another thing is that there isn't two defined roads for vehicles and pedestrians respectively, which means it's like you share the road with vehicles and such. Not something to my liking.

Oh ya, and then there's like this 1 hour jet lag, which wasn't to my liking either. (Singapore is ahead 1 hour)

At the ferry (still in Singapore)

Look...at....the...vast...sea....

The clouds look very big, doesn't it?

The ferry terminal at Indonesia.

Just another view.

K I'll admit I'm random.

Rural farms for the geog students.

Your eyes are playing tricks on you. My sister is so not taller than me!! I grew 1 cm this month! And look at that sian-diao look on my sis's face 0.0

It reads "Don't banish remain of cigarette all over this area".

At the jetty before going back to Singapore.

You don't get to see water this blue, do you?

I want to stay happy, I'm trying to.

2009-04-09T00:50:00.006+08:00

Stop venting your anger at us, idiot.
We are not a punching bag that whenever you are stressed/ frustrated/ itrritated, you can simply channel all your anger to us.
You're not the only one who is stressed alright?
没有那么大的头就不要戴那么大的帽子
If you don't have that much of a calibre to handle too many competitions and leadership positions at a time, then stop taking more competitions.
Quality, not quantity.
We've had enough of your crappy attitude. Sorry to say, we do not conform to people, and we simply don't care if you have your mood swings or whatever. Hell, all of us feel stress from time to time, but we don't vent all our anger at our friends. Stop making those stupid sarcastic remarks like as if we have no feelings.
跟你做朋友，真得很辛苦。
Sometimes you treat us well, somtimes you treat us like shit. That's not what friends are. Worse stil, after venting your anger, you can pretend as if nothing has happened, and continue fooling around. No, not even an apology of any sort.
Sorry to say, but you have no sense of responsibility, no sense of EQ and no sense of time management. You can't priorities what more important and what's not.

--
E-learning day simply sucks. Especially when your sister is in the same school as yours, there's only one computer that can function properly (that laggy laptop of mine simply won't function properly), and as the bigger sister, you have to give in to your younger sister. ZZZ.

So anyway yesterday, or technically today, I slept at 1.30am. Had a muscle cramp in the early morning -.- Stayed up so late just to finish the P.E, SS and 1/2 HCL (no not hydrochloric acid) assignment. Reached school for the Chem-Comm rehearsal, urgh don't wanna say anything about that. Disgusted. Lunch-ed at Subway with Sherlyn and Jia Ying and later did homework at library. I saw Ruth, Rachel, Xiao Mei, Zhe Ching and Kun Liang (in order of seeing, lol) in one single day.

--
I'm sick and tired of giving in and compromising endlessly. For once, I want to be more selfish, to put myself before others. Argh. Don't take me for granted.
--
I want to stay happy, I'm trying to.

2009-04-08T20:33:00.002+08:00

Tags replied:

Sheng Ying: Haha don't worry, I'll post it on the Tenor blog when my cable wanna work XD
Joshua: Relinked =D
Hui Ping: Ya, sadly =( The new skin and the old skin on my leg don't match =(
AMP: I thought as long as your phone can go to the Internet you can blog already? 'Cus it's just like surfing the Net with your phone, I thought? Lol not very sure.

--
Life had been so hectic these days. I can forsee that I would only be able to relax after MYE. Argh. 'Cus immediately one week after SYF, there's English MYE, just great. -.-

Anyway, I love today's PE lesson. XD Played handball and basketball. I love handball a lot!
And I finally grew taller, by 1 cm, making me only one last cm to my target of 160cm.

Digressing a little, I remember once I read an article about how if you take panadol (specifically paracetemol), you would slowly become immune to the pain accociated with the common cold and won't even realise the virus in the body, which is obviously not a good thing 'cus it weakens your immune system and make you more susceptible to other diseases. But sometimes the numbness is what people need doesn't it? So that you continue with your crazy life and not lag back.

Oh ya, and Monday's Lit lesson was quite interesting. Apparently Silas's group managed to find an article on how Panasonic is trying to launch a wall-sized TV technology. OMG. Fahrenheit 451 parlour wall. GARH!! Please, I do not want to live in such a society. No no no!

And also, I heard/ read from the CNA/ZB Comma that a certain state launched a statelite/ missile? 朝鲜 or something along that line. I think that it is very unwise for them to be doing so. 'Cus firstly, economic recession, stop wasting your $ on stuffs like that. And secondly, don't let a WWIII happen due to this, it's stupid.
-.- It's like in this matter, you can't tell who's right and who's wrong, like is it the UN (I typed LON just now -.-, history students should know what I mean ) or North Korea. N.K had tried using the pretext of launching a satelite 10 years ago to launch a missile, and you can never tell if it's a trap again this time.

Urgh. I hate politics.

2009-04-04T08:21:00.001+08:00

Hi people, currently inside the waiting room at the Tanah Merah Ferry Terminal. There's wireless here! Woohoo~ Anyway, just in case you all are wondering, I'm using my phone, not my laptop, which I did not bring anyway. Hopefully when I reach Indonesia, there would be wireless too :)
so anyway, just wishing that everyone can have a nice weekend. Also, if you all need to contact me, try to sms me, unless it is so urgent that you need to call, like a class relay or something.

2009-04-03T20:57:00.002+08:00

Just a short update today.

I think I sprained my right toe today before going to P.E at the stairs. 'Cus apparently I had wanted to jump down at the second flight of stairs, but somehow my brain was not functioning properly and commanded my legs to jump at the third flight of stairs, and when I realised what I was doing, I had already slipped down and injured my right leg. ZZZ. This is just great. -.-
Oh ya, I think Mrs Neo is a very cute P.E teacher! We can play any kind of games we want, so it's like some guys and girls are playing soccer, others are playing badminton, and the rest badminton.

And I'm going to Indonesia to 扫墓 over the weekend, so you most probably won't see me updating, 'cus I'm lazy to bring my laptop, and the WLAN coverage of my phone isn't all that hi-tech. But is there even wireless connection in the hotel? Anyway, I'm staying in the president suite, woohoo~

I'm sure to be bombarded with homework when I return back to Singapore on Sunday. Urgh.

The world's rapidly changing, and you can't do anything about it.

2009-03-28T14:08:00.005+08:00

Gosh. Dora the Explorer is going to have a makeover (or already have a makeover). She turned from some young innocent girl into a frivolous girl with makeup and jewellery. Yuck. O_O Personally, I'm not into favour of this change AT ALL. To tell the truth, I watched Dora the Explorer till I was like Primary 2/3?? And I feel that if they change her design, wouldn't they be teaching young children the wrong thing? What you do at 3 determines when you do at 80, doesn't it? If young children are taught through the public that it's alright to be frivolous, then what will become of our society? -.-

This link me back to one talk Mrs Selvi had with the pure lit class on Thursday. We were talking about how it's becoming harder and harder to please the majority since with advance technology, the world is continuing to subdivide and many groups of minorities are formed. It is difficult to please either party, as they have different rules to abide to. Sometimes it's scary, how advancing technology can lead to the fall of mankind. The 'role model' for children can be easily edited from a girl that sparks people's interest for nature, Maths and Science to a being a mindless frivolous girl that spends her time on jewellery. Haiz. Having Dora growing up in the stereotypical way like what most girls does in the US is plainly disgusting alright. T_T

--
Maybe the next time I should leave a notebook on my desk table, so I can scribble some interesting stuffs that happened during lessons instead of racking my brain to recall. -.-
But anyway, there's the Groove It! showcase on Monday. I was quite surprised the part when we changed from quavers to triplets was quite well done, as we spent lots of time polishing that during the rehearsal and the effect wasn't quite there. But we got so nervous we forgot to sway our bodies, haha =P The Music lyricist group was super funny, changing Taylor Swift's Love Story to Ramly's Burger (you one you always see at Pasar Malam). Even the lyrics was funny!

Wednesday had 2.4km run, and I fell when I was at the 975 bus stop turning to Lot 1? I don't know how to desribe, but it's somewhere along the 300 bus stop and the 975 one. Thanks Sherlyn for slowing down and helping me run the rest of the way back to the stopping point. I think I implicated her, if not she could have ran faster =x And there's a very kind person from I guess is 3A who ran towards me just to ask me if I was okay. I'm really grateful for that.

So anyway now I have 3 ugly scars on both my knees, one on the right (fell down during Music Camp, remember?) and 2 on the left. But thankfully this time round it didn't hurt as much as the either time.

And luckily for the rest of the day Mrs Poh didn't change our seating arrangement, so my neighbours were still Le En, Sherlyn, Melissa, Liang Bing and Xi Xi for that whole day.

Though sadly Mrs Poh changed it on Thursday =( But at least Melissa's still in front of me, with Xi Xi next to me. But Le En and Sherlyn's so far away! =( Liang Bing's a table away from me, sitting with Elmo.

Oh ya, did I mention that Liang Bing, Xi Xi and I forgot whether it's Jia Yu or Qin Yu watch D.Gray-man? That's so cool. =D One more topic to talk to them, and I kinda know the Chinese translations for the characters' names and terms, so it should be possible to start a discussion on the story line. Lol. And Liang Bing watches Skip Beat too!

And I have to especially thank Liang Bing and Xi Xi for helping me with my Maths. =D

Then yesterday we had CO practice and my sister waited for me. Kinda rare (oops XD) Ms Kong let us hear the computer's version of The Cicada, which I wasn't in favour of. It lacked feelings, like what SLS said. And somehow I feel that western instruments cannot be substituted for eastern instruments, like using violin and viola to represent the hu qin. I can't say more for cello, ''cus technically it is a western instrument. But I don't like how it represented the sheng with the oboe or the di zi with flute.

A pity Wei Qi couldn't come 'cus her school ended late. And practice ended early due to the A Stars programme, we couldn't get to see Wei Qi even though she's coming back to tutor for the programme. Urgh, irony again.

2009-03-27T18:46:00.000+08:00

Gosh, how long has it been since I last updated? I seriously lost count. Anyway to sum things up, I'm getting more and more tired each day, swarmed by competitions and homework. Urgh. This is gonna be a long post full of grudges, 'cus

1) Mrs Selvi is leaving next semester and I DON'T WANT that. Yuck. I don't her to leave la, she's such a good literature teacher =(( I really hope she would stay in BPGHS instead of going to JC. =( I'll miss her lessons so much, where the 10 of us would role play and read out the story to make it more interesting and more thought-povoking. It's Mrs Selvi who ignited my love for Literature, which was a subject I took unwilling 'cus I wanted to take History. But now I'm loving Literature more and more each day, and I don't want that to stop. I'm uncertain if the new trainee teacher would be able to keep that love igniting or not. Haiz.

2) SYF is on 20th April, and I think our school's performing at 10am?? But that's not the point. The point is, there's only like 4 more weeks left, and less than 5 practices for me due to the HSK and Chem-Comm, and the whole orchestra is still having problems with their 音准. Gold suddenly seems so far away =( I really want a gold, and I can safely assure you that I would definitely cry that day when it was announced that we didn't get a gold. People should really stop SLACKING and buck up la!

3) Competitions are swarming up. ThinkQuest, Chem-Comm, SYF, NUS-Fact or Fantasy, HSK (considered). My gosh. ThinkQuest's ending April, so that's good. Chem-Comm's competition date is on April 11th, which means I'll miss one CO practice. Darn it. NUS- Fact or Fantasy, in May, I think Mr Lim have no plan of training us eh? Training haven't even started -.- Then there's this HSK test to test our Chinese standard, and there's a briefing that lasts 3 hours (my gosh) from 1-4pm next friday, meaning half a CO practice gone. Can I roll my eyes? Then the actual HSK's on 18 April, yet another CO practice gone. Urgh.

4) After SYF, our sec 4/5 seniors will be stepping down, and I DON'T WANT that. Urgh. Life in CO sucks without them. And I think I'm not ready to take over the teaching of the juniors yet. I mean, even I have my weaknesses on music theory! I'd definitely miss their goofiness, humour, and their caringness (is there such a word? But you get the point). =(

5) It's just one week after the March holidays, and there's only 5 more weeks to Mid-year Exams. How great is that huh? And not to mention lots of class tests in between, like having SS time practice, A.Math Logarithm test. And there's still public speaking coming up. Something I really wish it would be an impromtu speech, so there's nothing to prepare about. But here's the irony. If you can't prepare for it, you'd have to rely on your acting skills (to look calm and full of conviction)/ vocabulary (to make an impression)/ analytical skills (to analyse the question and answer it efficiently/ responsiveness ( to quickly react when the topic is thrown to you), and you don't know whether you're good at that or not. Urgh.

Life 3 life is really fast-paced, and I really can't imagine how my sec 4 life will be. I'm thankful that at least I have good friends and classmates whom I can rely on. It seems like there's no time at all to stop in your tracks to think, 'cus you'd be thrown off the track, and that's really sad, no? It's like a parody of the society in Fahrenheit 451, just that it's a not a propaganda by the government for people to stop thinking about their society and just to be equally retarded retards doing seemingly everything yet nothing, like if you starts thinking, you'd be the wierd one. If you're not busy, you're weird. Little ironies of life, haiz.

2009-03-15T14:44:00.001+08:00

Tags replied:

Jorin: Thanks =D Maybe barh...
Le Tian: Thanks.
Sheng Ying: Yo woman. Love you XD
Jia Ying: Lol was it that difficult to find?
Hui Ping: Haha Danson rocks too XD
Le En: =DD Haha thanks!

Holidays' here, but there's no holiday mood =(( So many projects and homework that need to be done, haiz. =( So anyway, tuesday we went to Singapore Conference Hall for the rehearsal for SYF, teachers in charge kept stressing that 1 min $16 XD After tuning and all that Hui Ping, Kee Leng and I roamed about SCH and took some pictures.

Hui Ping and I 'endorsing' for the gummy which I forgot the name =x

And not to forget Kee Leng 'endorsing' for the Loafers wafer. (It's Keefe at the back XD)

And another shot.

Rehearsal's quite okay I guess. But time sure does fly =( SLS say he can't hear cello, omg! Maybe it's due to seating arrangements?

And of course, on the way back on the bus, our beloved double bassists joined us =D Hence it's more photo taking session on the way back haha.

Featuring Zaki, Iddo and Sheng Ying aka Erica =P

And Hui Ping and me.

Tenor Section, missing Jeryl and Wan Er [who refused to be in the photo =( ]

Sorry for the blurry image.

Jeryl and Kee Leng.

--
Thursday made IC in school, and can you believe I still live in the era where they take your blood group for your IC? Well basically they abolished this practice, and therefore I still do not know what my blood group is. Sad. =( I bet the officer who did my IC would be laughing at me for asking her "Won't you be taking my blood group?". Ah... So embarrassing.

Friday was the Sports Carnival. Sian, the referees are biased. Super biased. Our PRCs scholars are technically not in the basketball school team with effect when the tournament ended, but yet they do not allow them to join the game. Worse still, our class only have about 15 males? So in the end they reluctantly let them join the game. Argh. All the teams did us proud =D I can't believe that people resort to violence when playing basketball, like that two classes. Yuck. Shameless people. And the referees closed one eye at them, making me super disgusted.

Then rushed over to CCAB for music camp audition. In front of Hui Ping and I were two cellists from Hwa Chong, and behind us were another two cellists from RGS. I'm awed by them! They even know how to play the Bach´s Cello Suite No. 1, something which I aspire to play but will never be able master given my limited knowledge on music. Haiz.
--

Saturday was the music exchange between Fu Hua, Northland, Pioneer JC, Bukit Batok, Teck Whye Sec and us at the CCK CC. Heard their set pieces and of course choice pieces. (Though I thought we ain't supposed to play the set pieces before the SYF??)

And I seriously think I'm such a fool sometimes. I actually carried back my cello back to school (two buses' trip away) and took the chartered bus to CCK CC, when the CC was just opposite my house. Just what in the world was I thinking anyway? I swore I could have woke up at 9am and reach the CC at 9.30am instead of waking up at 7am to prepare. ZZZ.

During the rehearsal, KL, HP and I were like paying super close attention to the bar 33 of 蝉歌- triplets. Apparently some schools purposely slowed down at that bar to make the triplets sound like the quavers, while some schools played it slowly so they won't mess up the triplets. Different schools have different approaches to this bar, I guess.

After the performance the bus came so most people had to go back to school, but I stayed with our bassists to watch other schools' performance (since I live so near anyway).

2009-03-06T17:20:00.000+08:00

So I'm back here again, so no whatsoever reasons. Just feel like changing back. =S

Anyway, secondary 3 life has been so hectic, that sometime I compare myself to my cousin, who just graduated from HCJC with 4As!! I think I'm busier than her.. Stressed up now, 'cus currently I have 2 cousins (age closest to me) who got 7A1s and went into HCJC. They are my motivation but ironically the root of my stress, haha...

Somtimes, I really wonder why I stress myself up like that. For my future? Perhaps so. But the future is stil an unknown, I should treasure my teenage life more, 'cus once it's gone, it's gone forever. Haiz. I know this is a crazy though and ironical too, but sometimes I wonder what would happen if I had lived in a hedonistic society like in F451. No books, run into lamp posts all day long, but then again, life's is meaningless that way.

Oh well. Anyway, let's talk about something closer to us: Common Test. Common test ended like 1 or 2 weeks ago, and we finally got back all our test papers. Frankly speaking, I had more expectations of myself than what I got, especially my physics. But I got 6A1s, so I should be contented? Both my languages got B3, I really have to buck up!! Oh speaking of which, I think Melissa and I really have 默契 lor. All but few of our test papers have the same or +1/-1 marks. Cool isn't it? And it's like Bio we got the same marks, History we got the same marks, then Lit, HMT, SS, Chem all are one mark difference.

Gonna buck up in both academic and CCA! I wanna at least a grade 3 for my cello! Saving up for it currently. Le En said she would be my accompainment, woohoo =DD Let's play that song together, haha XD